An English country girl in California: The curious incident of the hammock and the Highland cows

It was a normal Monday afternoon when the call came. As it was a quiet week, with not too many guests, Hadley was taking the opportunity to take the just-broken four-year-olds on their first trail ride. I was riding Aztec, otherwise known as the School Bus, in front of them to provide a nice solid palomino backside for them to bounce off if necessary (in the event, they were beautifully behaved, apart from a slight hiccup off the track and down the hill by Berbera). Returning to the corral, a local chap arrived in a truck with the news that two Highland steers belonging to the Bitterroot were caught up in a hammock down by a neighbouring ranch. So what could we do but gather the troops and ride on over?

James and Clem into the fray

Richard, James, Joe and Clem fired up the four-wheelers (quad bikes to my English readers) and set off at high speed along the valley. I clung on behind Joe, reflecting that despite his excellent driving, it’s a jolly sight easier cantering along a narrow trail through the sage brush on a horse than on a bone-shattering mechanical device. Bouncing past the colts’ field and the bentonite mounds, we left Bitterroot land to the currently deserted ranch, where abandoned canoes lie forlornly by a lake and an ancient windmill creaks round and round.

The deserted ranch, where once upon a time

someone must have reclined in a hammock

There were cows all over the place, but none seemed to have any kind of hammock attached to them. We split up and headed back towards the Bitterroot, when James gave a shout from amid the willows that lined a creek: ‘I’ve found them!’ Goodness knows how, but two Highland steers, one cream, one chestnut, had managed to entangle an old hammock tightly around their horns. Locked together, they looked like a pair of elderly dowagers in lace caps, but who sadly weren’t too keen on being in each other’s company. I couldn’t help but be reminded of the story of the two duchesses who, greeting each other with an icily polite kiss at a ball, found their tiaras locked together so tightly that only a discreet footman could release them. This was an equally amusing sight, especially when the pair suffered a difference of opinion about which side of a tree was best and got stuck with the trunk in the middle.

First glimpse of the hammock-bound pair

Not a tenable position for a couple of Highlands

Finally, the troops assembled, and Richard mounted up behind Joe, rope in hand. Thus the Great Highland Cow Chase ensued…

Now, how are we going to do this?

Ride 'em cowboy!

It would have been far too easy to have roped them immediately, and they led us a merry dance up one side of the valley, down and across the creek, through acres of sage brush and down again near to where we started. It would have been an awful lot more comfortable on horseback, but this was cowboy work modern-style, and once you’ve left your quad behind, it’s your own two feet or nothing.

First approach...

Richard tries to stop them from making a get-away...

but fails...

In hot pursuit

Breathless from running – at least, I was – we paused to let the steers calm down and have a quick roping lesson from the resident expert, Richard. The boys looked good, and we stealthily approached the pair, bunched up with their fellows by the creek. A few skirmishes later, and James got close enough to let fly with his rope, and scored a bull’s eye on the head of the chestnut one. They took off in outrage, but the boys hung on, and belayed the line around a tree. Richard roped a hind foot of each steer, whereupon with a final wrench the cream one pulled himself free and took off in triumph. The chestnut, pinned to the ground upside down, was far more entangled, but quick work with a knife soon saw it free of knots and mesh. With a little encouragement he was on his way too, apparently none the worse for the ordeal.

Richard tries a throw

Quick roping lesson

Got 'em!

Lashing them to some convenient trees

Hind foot roped with a neat throw...and a quick exit made

Only one cow left, but still a lot of extricating to do!

A delicate cutting operation

Free at last!

Me and Joe on our trusty steed

With the sun setting, we raced homewards on a glorious evening to a fantastic roast turkey dinner – all in all, a perfect Bitterroot day.

Homeward bound

A couple of days later, I, Richard, Hadley, wrangler Megan and all the guests saddled up and rode over to the scene of the action to move the errant cows off our neighbours' land and back into the Shoshone National Forest, where they're supposed to be at this time of year. Leaving the Bitterroot, we spread out along the creek, finding, conveniently, that the cows were just where we had left them.

Moving the cows along the willows, past the scene of the earlier day's action

Past the ranch towards Shoshone National Forest

We pushed them steadily along the willows with the minimum of fuss, past the lake and back through two gates to the forest land. The guests acquitted themselves admirably, and my horse, Juba, a pretty grey Arab, was beautifully behaved. Being young, he hasn't quite settled to following guests and has a habit of chucking his head about when going downhill, but he was good as gold when off on his own and was very keen to get at the cows. A proper cow pony in the making!

Richard, looking more like a cowboy on a horse than he did on a quad,

leads the herd safely through a gate

Juba's ears in customary alert pose

Amusingly, the two who had been caught in the hammock were still together, moseying along at the front of the herd. Either they hadn't realised they were free, or their enforced heart-to-heart had made them the best of friends. In any case, it was a very satisfying conclusion to a very unusual Bitterroot adventure!